No narration. Just speech.
"Oh Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?"
"I'm right here."
"What?"
"I'm right here. You asked where I am. I'm here. Right in front of you."
"I didn't say where art thou, I said wherefore art thou."
"Right. Where. I'm here talking to you."
"Wherefore doesn't mean where, Romeo."
"What do you mean?"
"Wherefore means why."
"If wherefore means why, then why not just say why?"
"What?"
"Sorry - I mean, wherefore not say why? We live in a stupid time for grammar."
"It's about being artistic with your words."
"You're saying artists are bad at grammar?"
"I'm saying you need to catch up with the times."
"'The times' being when you forsake a one syllable word that's three letters, in favour of a drawn-out two syllable word that's eight letters and sounds like you're saying something completely different?"
"Yes. I mean no. I mean, wait... what?"
"So what's your word for whether?"
"Weather is my word for weather. Wait, what weather?"
"Do you have another word for whether that I'm supposed to know about, which is really 'hither' or something?"
"Hither means here."
"So you're hithering me speak to you right now? See, that doesn't make any sense!"
"Of course not, because I can't place you do anything."
"Your grammar hurts my brain. And what about whether?"
"The weather's fine. Seriously, you're standing in it."
"I'm not standing in anything, there's just ground beneath me."
"Right, because you're hither with me."
"Yes, I'm hearing you. You're standing right in front of me."
"Not hear like I hear you, here like we're standing here."
"Oh. If hither is your magical word for here, what's your word for there?"
"Thither."
"Well that's just lazy."
"Adding a T at the beginning is good enough for the short version."
"Right, but if you're creating new and longer and more extravagant words for things, you'd think you'd have some more imagination when it came to differentiating between them. What happens if you mix them up? People won't know what you're talking about."
"According to you, you already don't know what I'm talking about."
"Right, and then you won't have any idea either, because you confused yourself. You'll feel like a moron."
"Fine, I'll revert to boring language when I'm talking with you."
"Thank you. What was your question again?"
"Why are you Romeo?"
"Because my parents dig expensive cars."
"You're weird."
2020-06-22 · Boss Music Intensifies
2020-06-15 · Accept the Unexpected
2020-06-08 · Failing The Test
2020-06-01 · Best Laid Plans
2020-05-25 · The End?
2020-05-18 · The Only Explanation
2020-05-11 · Personal Victory
2020-05-04 · Six Questions
2020-04-27 · It's A Team Effort
2020-04-20 · The More Things Change
2020-04-13 · It's All About Perspective
2020-04-06 · Fake It 'Til You Make It
2020-03-30 · Keeping It Clean
2020-03-23 · How To Save The World
2020-03-16 · Time For A Change
2020-03-09 · Music To My Ears
2020-03-02 · Unfamiliar Territory
2020-02-24 · Something From Nothing
2020-02-17 · The Times Are Changing
2020-02-10 · The Missing Piece
2020-02-03 · Wrong Place, Wrong Time
2020-01-27 · Overexposure
2020-01-20 · As Seen On TV
2020-01-13 · Written By A.I.
2020-01-06 · Promises Kept
2019-12-30 · Ringing It In
2019-12-23 · Happy Unspecified Seasonal Holiday!
2019-12-16 · The Lair
2019-12-09 · Time To Get Cracking
2019-12-02 · Not A Suicide
2019-11-25 · The One That Knows What Number It Is
2019-11-18 · Venting Frustrations
2019-11-11 · The Test Takers
2019-11-04 · Make Your Play
2019-10-28 · Horror With Smart People
2019-10-21 · The Interview
2019-10-14 · It Must Have Happened At Some Point
2019-10-07 · Work The Problem
2019-09-30 · Cogs in the Machine
2019-09-23 · First of One
2019-09-16 · Curse Your Inevitable Betrayal!
2019-09-09 · Be Brief
2019-09-02 · Changing Channels
2019-08-26 · It's A Process
2019-08-19 · Armed And Dangerous
2019-08-12 · Good Intentions
2019-08-05 · A Simple Procedure
2019-07-29 · Finale Feelings
2019-07-22 · Fun And Profit
2019-07-15 · It Builds Character
2019-07-08 · Aviator Safety
2019-06-24 · Something's Been Bugging Me
2019-06-17 · It's All About You
2019-05-27 · Rough Encounters
2019-05-20 · Wishes Three
2019-05-13 · A Gentle Nudge
2019-05-06 · A Simple Misunderstanding?
2019-04-29 · Don't Spoil It
2019-04-22 · Under Scrutiny
2019-04-15 · Prepare To Resist
2019-04-08 · Making Small Talk
2019-04-01 · The Crisis
2019-03-25 · Just Kidding
2019-03-18 · How About That Local Sports Team?
2019-03-11 · Public Engagement
2019-03-04 · The Hero We Need
2019-02-25 · The Negotiation
2019-02-18 · Executive Orders
2019-02-11 · The Talk
2019-02-04 · The Big Game
2019-01-28 · If It's A Girl...
2019-01-21 · The Nature Of Picasso
2019-01-14 · I'm Sorry, Ms. Jackson
2019-01-07 · Never Saw It Coming
2018-12-31 · Duelling ...Holidays?
2018-12-24 · Too Much Cheer
2018-12-17 · Taking Out The Trash
2018-12-10 · Let's Go To The Movies
2018-12-03 · Not For Donuts
2018-11-26 · Horizons Made Broad
2018-11-19 · It's The Journey That Matters
2018-11-12 · Anthing You Can Do...
2018-11-05 · Let's Call It "Laundry"
2018-10-29 · Unfriended
2018-10-22 · A Conversation About "Tacos"
2018-10-15 · Changes
2018-10-08 · An Adult-Sized Secret
2018-10-01 · Street War
2018-09-24 · Whither Whether Why
2018-09-17 · The Pitch
2018-09-10 · The One That's Meta
2018-09-03 · A Night At The Movies
2018-08-27 · We're Vampires
2018-08-20 · The Final Showdown
2018-08-13 · The End Of The World
2018-08-06 · A More Rational Kind Of Love
2018-07-30 · Death Troubles
2018-07-23 · True Love
2018-07-18 · At Least It's Not Des Moines