No narration. Just speech.
"Hey I got one."
"One what?"
"A fake ID, man. I got one."
"That's awesome, where's mine?"
"I said I got one."
"Why didn't you get one for me too?"
"I didn't have your picture. Plus it was like, two hundred dollars. I don't have enough cash for two."
"Okay. So what can we do with it?"
"What do you mean 'what can we do with it?' We use it to buy cigarettes and beer!"
"Nice. Can I see it?"
"Yeah, check it out."
"Huh."
"What?"
"Hmm? Nothing, it just reminded me of something."
"What did it remind you of?"
"Nothing important. Hey we should start putting this to use right away. Let's go get some alcohol."
"There's a beer store a block over."
"Let's go."
"Cool."
"You know, you should probably rehearse what you're gonna say."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, adults don't talk like you and me. They're all smooth and stuff."
"What? I'm smooth."
"Yeah, but you're not adult smooth. Like, you can't be saying 'um' and 'uh' or anything like that."
"Okay."
"And they always know exactly what they're going to say. They don't stumble on their words like you do sometimes."
"Okay, how's this: 'Hello sir, I am an adult. Where's your beer?' "
"No, see, adults don't walk around talking about how they're adults. You have to be more casual."
"Hey man, where's your beer?"
"That's better. Except you're going to the beer store. It should be everywhere, right?"
"Hey that's right. How about: 'Hey, I'm here to buy some beer.' ?"
"They know that already. Because you're in the beer store. You know what? Just don't say any more than you absolutely have to."
"Okay. Here goes."
"Good luck."
"...Hey."
"Hey man."
"...I can't believe that worked! He totally bought me as an adult. Okay, let's get... why are there so many to choose from? How have I never heard of anything in here? Whatever, it's beer. I'll just get something I know. There we go. Fake ID, work your magic. ... I'll take this."
"ID please?"
"Here you go."
"Hm. I can't accept this."
"Why not? It's my ID."
"It says you're five-foot-twelve."
"And?"
"That's not a real thing. Plus you're way shorter than that."
"Are you accusing me of using a fake ID?"
"Yes. That's exactly what I'm saying."
"You can't prove that!"
"I just did. Look, take this back and get out of here. Come back when you're 19."
"Fine. ... It didn't work."
"I know."
"How do you know?"
"Because you're not holding any beer. And you look angry."
"He called me on my fake ID on a technicality."
"Was it that it says you're five-foot-twelve?"
"You knew?"
"Of course I knew, I'm not an idiot. But you are for not checking it before you paid for it."
"You suck. So now what?"
"Let's just steal some from my dad."
"Yeah, that sounds way easier."
"Idiot."
2020-06-22 · Boss Music Intensifies
2020-06-15 · Accept the Unexpected
2020-06-08 · Failing The Test
2020-06-01 · Best Laid Plans
2020-05-25 · The End?
2020-05-18 · The Only Explanation
2020-05-11 · Personal Victory
2020-05-04 · Six Questions
2020-04-27 · It's A Team Effort
2020-04-20 · The More Things Change
2020-04-13 · It's All About Perspective
2020-04-06 · Fake It 'Til You Make It
2020-03-30 · Keeping It Clean
2020-03-23 · How To Save The World
2020-03-16 · Time For A Change
2020-03-09 · Music To My Ears
2020-03-02 · Unfamiliar Territory
2020-02-24 · Something From Nothing
2020-02-17 · The Times Are Changing
2020-02-10 · The Missing Piece
2020-02-03 · Wrong Place, Wrong Time
2020-01-27 · Overexposure
2020-01-20 · As Seen On TV
2020-01-13 · Written By A.I.
2020-01-06 · Promises Kept
2019-12-30 · Ringing It In
2019-12-23 · Happy Unspecified Seasonal Holiday!
2019-12-16 · The Lair
2019-12-09 · Time To Get Cracking
2019-12-02 · Not A Suicide
2019-11-25 · The One That Knows What Number It Is
2019-11-18 · Venting Frustrations
2019-11-11 · The Test Takers
2019-11-04 · Make Your Play
2019-10-28 · Horror With Smart People
2019-10-21 · The Interview
2019-10-14 · It Must Have Happened At Some Point
2019-10-07 · Work The Problem
2019-09-30 · Cogs in the Machine
2019-09-23 · First of One
2019-09-16 · Curse Your Inevitable Betrayal!
2019-09-09 · Be Brief
2019-09-02 · Changing Channels
2019-08-26 · It's A Process
2019-08-19 · Armed And Dangerous
2019-08-12 · Good Intentions
2019-08-05 · A Simple Procedure
2019-07-29 · Finale Feelings
2019-07-22 · Fun And Profit
2019-07-15 · It Builds Character
2019-07-08 · Aviator Safety
2019-06-24 · Something's Been Bugging Me
2019-06-17 · It's All About You
2019-05-27 · Rough Encounters
2019-05-20 · Wishes Three
2019-05-13 · A Gentle Nudge
2019-05-06 · A Simple Misunderstanding?
2019-04-29 · Don't Spoil It
2019-04-22 · Under Scrutiny
2019-04-15 · Prepare To Resist
2019-04-08 · Making Small Talk
2019-04-01 · The Crisis
2019-03-25 · Just Kidding
2019-03-18 · How About That Local Sports Team?
2019-03-11 · Public Engagement
2019-03-04 · The Hero We Need
2019-02-25 · The Negotiation
2019-02-18 · Executive Orders
2019-02-11 · The Talk
2019-02-04 · The Big Game
2019-01-28 · If It's A Girl...
2019-01-21 · The Nature Of Picasso
2019-01-14 · I'm Sorry, Ms. Jackson
2019-01-07 · Never Saw It Coming
2018-12-31 · Duelling ...Holidays?
2018-12-24 · Too Much Cheer
2018-12-17 · Taking Out The Trash
2018-12-10 · Let's Go To The Movies
2018-12-03 · Not For Donuts
2018-11-26 · Horizons Made Broad
2018-11-19 · It's The Journey That Matters
2018-11-12 · Anthing You Can Do...
2018-11-05 · Let's Call It "Laundry"
2018-10-29 · Unfriended
2018-10-22 · A Conversation About "Tacos"
2018-10-15 · Changes
2018-10-08 · An Adult-Sized Secret
2018-10-01 · Street War
2018-09-24 · Whither Whether Why
2018-09-17 · The Pitch
2018-09-10 · The One That's Meta
2018-09-03 · A Night At The Movies
2018-08-27 · We're Vampires
2018-08-20 · The Final Showdown
2018-08-13 · The End Of The World
2018-08-06 · A More Rational Kind Of Love
2018-07-30 · Death Troubles
2018-07-23 · True Love
2018-07-18 · At Least It's Not Des Moines