No narration. Just speech.
"I'm fighting Glats."
"That sentence makes no sense."
"In Life Crawler."
"Still nothing."
"Are you aware of a thing called video games?"
"I am."
"Life Crawler is a video game."
"Is it good?"
"Yes. Glats is a boss in it."
"Okay."
"He's very difficult."
"If you say so."
"I do."
"And you're telling me that you're fighting him because...?"
"Because I'm playing blind, and I don't want any spoilers."
"You're not blind."
"No, I mean I'm playing without already knowing anything about it."
"So you're playing ignorant?"
"No, look; it's called a blind run."
"Why?"
"Because you haven't seen it before. So if you were to play it, for instance, since you haven't heard of it before and have no prior experience with it, your first playthrough would be blind."
"If you say so. But also, how would I give you spoilers on a game I haven't heard of before?"
"I didn't know that you didn't know anything about it."
"But wouldn't telling me where you are just be more likely to elicit spoilers from me if I knew any?"
"I was saying it as a caution so that you wouldn't talk about the fight openly, which could contain spoilers."
"Have you ever heard me talk about that game before?"
"No."
"Then why would you think I'd be talking about a specific fight from it? Unprompted, no less?"
"I was just covering my bases. You never know who's around or what they're talking about."
"That sounds like you're paranoid."
"I think a reasonable dose of paranoia is good for you."
"That's just what they want you to think."
"Stop that."
"I have a shiny hat for you."
"Quiet."
"Have you checked yourself for microchips?"
"I'm going to hurt you."
"Like you're hurting Glats?"
"Actually I haven't hit him yet."
"Doesn't sound like much of a fight. How long have you been going?"
"Five hours."
"Five hours and you haven't even attacked him yet? Are you sure you're good at this game?"
"I didn't say I haven't attacked, I said I haven't hit him. He keeps dodging."
"Which is to be expected from an opponent."
"Not in this game. Everyone else just stands there and takes it."
"Doesn't sound like much of a challenge."
"Almost every RPG is like that."
"Life Crawler is an RPG then?"
"Well I don't want to say too much about it now, in case you decide to play it."
"Because you've done such a stellar job of selling me on it so far."
"Look, Life Crawler... is like the Matrix."
"You never know what you're gonna get?"
"No, that's Forest Gump."
"You can't look directly at it or your face melts?"
"That's Raiders of the Lost Ark."
"Are you my father?"
"Please stop quoting random movies. You can't really be told what Life Crawler is - you have to see it for yourself."
"So you want me to watch you fight glass for hours on end?"
"First of all, it's not glass, it's Glats. And secondly, no, I want you to play it without knowing anything about it."
"Can we just acknowledge that Glats is a weird name?"
"All names are weird."
"Well I can't argue with that. What name do you suppose the government calls you by?"
"Shush."
"You're right, that's a weird name too."
"Look, are you going to try it or not?"
"Sure, I'll give it a go."
"Great. Now, leave me alone and let me get back to this."
"Dude, you called me."
"Right. In that case, I'm gonna go."
"Have fun getting mind controlled by your computer screen."
"I hate you so much."
2020-06-22 · Boss Music Intensifies
2020-06-15 · Accept the Unexpected
2020-06-08 · Failing The Test
2020-06-01 · Best Laid Plans
2020-05-25 · The End?
2020-05-18 · The Only Explanation
2020-05-11 · Personal Victory
2020-05-04 · Six Questions
2020-04-27 · It's A Team Effort
2020-04-20 · The More Things Change
2020-04-13 · It's All About Perspective
2020-04-06 · Fake It 'Til You Make It
2020-03-30 · Keeping It Clean
2020-03-23 · How To Save The World
2020-03-16 · Time For A Change
2020-03-09 · Music To My Ears
2020-03-02 · Unfamiliar Territory
2020-02-24 · Something From Nothing
2020-02-17 · The Times Are Changing
2020-02-10 · The Missing Piece
2020-02-03 · Wrong Place, Wrong Time
2020-01-27 · Overexposure
2020-01-20 · As Seen On TV
2020-01-13 · Written By A.I.
2020-01-06 · Promises Kept
2019-12-30 · Ringing It In
2019-12-23 · Happy Unspecified Seasonal Holiday!
2019-12-16 · The Lair
2019-12-09 · Time To Get Cracking
2019-12-02 · Not A Suicide
2019-11-25 · The One That Knows What Number It Is
2019-11-18 · Venting Frustrations
2019-11-11 · The Test Takers
2019-11-04 · Make Your Play
2019-10-28 · Horror With Smart People
2019-10-21 · The Interview
2019-10-14 · It Must Have Happened At Some Point
2019-10-07 · Work The Problem
2019-09-30 · Cogs in the Machine
2019-09-23 · First of One
2019-09-16 · Curse Your Inevitable Betrayal!
2019-09-09 · Be Brief
2019-09-02 · Changing Channels
2019-08-26 · It's A Process
2019-08-19 · Armed And Dangerous
2019-08-12 · Good Intentions
2019-08-05 · A Simple Procedure
2019-07-29 · Finale Feelings
2019-07-22 · Fun And Profit
2019-07-15 · It Builds Character
2019-07-08 · Aviator Safety
2019-06-24 · Something's Been Bugging Me
2019-06-17 · It's All About You
2019-05-27 · Rough Encounters
2019-05-20 · Wishes Three
2019-05-13 · A Gentle Nudge
2019-05-06 · A Simple Misunderstanding?
2019-04-29 · Don't Spoil It
2019-04-22 · Under Scrutiny
2019-04-15 · Prepare To Resist
2019-04-08 · Making Small Talk
2019-04-01 · The Crisis
2019-03-25 · Just Kidding
2019-03-18 · How About That Local Sports Team?
2019-03-11 · Public Engagement
2019-03-04 · The Hero We Need
2019-02-25 · The Negotiation
2019-02-18 · Executive Orders
2019-02-11 · The Talk
2019-02-04 · The Big Game
2019-01-28 · If It's A Girl...
2019-01-21 · The Nature Of Picasso
2019-01-14 · I'm Sorry, Ms. Jackson
2019-01-07 · Never Saw It Coming
2018-12-31 · Duelling ...Holidays?
2018-12-24 · Too Much Cheer
2018-12-17 · Taking Out The Trash
2018-12-10 · Let's Go To The Movies
2018-12-03 · Not For Donuts
2018-11-26 · Horizons Made Broad
2018-11-19 · It's The Journey That Matters
2018-11-12 · Anthing You Can Do...
2018-11-05 · Let's Call It "Laundry"
2018-10-29 · Unfriended
2018-10-22 · A Conversation About "Tacos"
2018-10-15 · Changes
2018-10-08 · An Adult-Sized Secret
2018-10-01 · Street War
2018-09-24 · Whither Whether Why
2018-09-17 · The Pitch
2018-09-10 · The One That's Meta
2018-09-03 · A Night At The Movies
2018-08-27 · We're Vampires
2018-08-20 · The Final Showdown
2018-08-13 · The End Of The World
2018-08-06 · A More Rational Kind Of Love
2018-07-30 · Death Troubles
2018-07-23 · True Love
2018-07-18 · At Least It's Not Des Moines